Not over you

it seems i really want to write about it. i keet thinking and playing it in my head. about what, about you.

you know what, all of those stuff that we did in the past is something precious. and i just can't let it go. even for a second. it's not that i can't, but i don't want to. what happen between us is beautiful. and sometimes, i keep playing stuff in my head that i'm assure that it will never happen. sometimes, that scenes seems so real. like it's really happening and i want that to happen. it's sort of a day dream, and not to forget flashback. owhh, flashback sure hurts. especially that pain one. but the beautiful about is it, it makes me feet stronger. i mean  where i stand now and what i was back then really set me through this life thing. i learn stuff, i make up stuff in my head, or i don't know if people call this crazy, i sometimes talk to myself, and pretending that the person is in front of me. it just make me feel so much better. sometimes i cry, maybe because i want those moments to really happen badly to myself and i know it's impossible. but see, dreaming is not that bad. it change people. and it is up to us how to react with the changes. 

i don't know is it bad to treat myself this way? but one think i know. it makes me feel better and i feel more confident towards myself to face those kind of people in my dreams. dreams might be wonderful and reality might be a pain in the ass. but one thing i know, because of dreams and reality, i am now a girl that is living my life to the fullest :)

p/s: selamat berbuka semua.