When things get rough. I decide to walk out of it. Run from it. Let it ease. Because i know eventually it will come back to me in either in the same way or others. Lately i've been putting closure in myself. Just like before, i prefer to take some times for myself. Where i go grab some drinks after works or movies all by myself. Spend most of my time getting to know someone. Smiles to strangers. Where i thought people don't really know much about me, or not at all. Ever you heard that you should love yourself in order to let people come in, i'm trying to figure out that right now. I'm not pushing people away. It's just that sometimes i can't navigate my own life. How i can be close to someone if i don't even know what i want in life? You don't expect people to barge in your life and understand you immediately don't ya? And what, do you really trust yourself to tell people all your secrets, weakness, pain to anyone? Done that, and i'm not going to do that again because it kicks you back so hard. I might be easily fall for someone, touched about something. But i've learned my lesson. I think. haha. Nevertheless i'm still trying. Falling and trying. Non stop since the past 22 years of my life. Growing older thought you to be more mature. I'm not saying that i'm in the right path or anything. Choosing the 'road not taken' theory as my guidance. Where i believe there are much more to explore in life than being sucks about the past or maybe the present. Take things slowly. Cry and be okay in the next minutes. Don't let people words ruined you. Don't let the past make you feel regret. And what if you make the same mistakes you are calling yourself stupid? Nahhh, it's call learning all over again. No regret baby, no regret.
Don't expect to people understand you. Don't expect people going to please you all the time. Even they are so called friends to you. Don't be to clingy to someone. Sometimes, all you need in life is actually yourself. Not even your blood related kinda relationship. Right?