Wednesday, January 9, 2013

Let me write

At some point in life, you're going to feel down. The lowest point in your life. Where you have this thing inside you, that's making you feeling sick about yourself. Stuff like life, study, family and all those dramas in life that you have to face, that you have to act, that you have to be in to actually survive. The feelings that world is being so unfair to you. That life have the power over people, which one was choose to have a better life and which not. 

I feel insecurities right now. Clamping my feet to the floor. Putting my self esteem at it's lowest point. Where i feel i will never be good enough for anyone, where i will never be with someone who's going to accept me for who i am, where i feel like i will never make my parents proud of me, where i feel like i'm not a good friends to anyone, where i feel like jumping off the edge is the best way to make me feel better, where i feel like crying my heart out won't help me anything.

i'm sitting helplessly thinking, what can i do to myself so i can be fine with all of these craps in life. What will happen to me in future if i let these hit me hard in the face?

I just want just one, at least something that can make me feel better. Where i can put a smile on my face sincerely. :')

i miss being happy 

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